I am a day dreamer.
A citizen. Maybe even a captive of my own Imagination.
The places I could go...
The things I could do...
The people I could meet...
The person I could become...
It all seems much more compelling than this life I am living.
I have noticed that many of my "great" thoughts happen early early in the morning.
It is more often than not during those wee hours, when I can't sleep that I seem to be exceptionally cognitive.
It is then that I let my mind travel most independently in a thousand different directions.
It is then that I almost feel like I am awake before all the great thoughts of the day have been taken.
It is then that everything is so incredibly quiet that I can almost hear the wheels of my wondering, questioning, believing mind turning.
And it is then that I feel most in touch with myself and my God.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Thursday, January 10, 2013
Epiphany?
Today I look around and my breath catches in my throat.
Surely I should take off my shoes, or raise up my hands, or fall to my knees... Surely this moment is Holy.
God has been so good to us!
I think of the opportunity I was given on Tuesday to buy 9 bundles of joy their very OWN Bible. (And for most their very FIRST bible too!) I think of the way that we have never once had 9 kids come to iGod on a single day, but I think of what a blessing it was to be forced to wait to hand out Bibles because we had 4 more kids show up than we had Bibles to give! Three of which I had never even seen before!
Now that's a "Problem" worth celebrating!
It blows me away that we have been at Creekwood every Wednesday afternoon since September and still haven't seen or met all the kids who live there. I think of all the kids who just in the last month or two have started coming regularly. Which makes me wonder how many more kids are out there maybe looking on apprehensively from their window each week, still trying to determine if we are just going to be another "short-term outreach project" or not. Still trying to determine if we are going to stick around or not.
I think everyone is still trying to figure us out.
I was just asked yesterday by one of the new girls what exactly we are doing in their neighborhood every week... I was quick to explain to her all the games we play, or the crafts we make, and the snacks we have. But right at the very end of our conversation I slipped in the part about Bible study. Yep, that's right, I "slipped" it in. Now I don't know about you, but if our mission is solely focused around sharing the love of Christ, I don't think having Bible study deserves to just be "Slipped" in at the end. If anything the bulk of my answer to her question should have been about all that takes place to equip them and help them grow in their relationship with the Lord, and then maybe a sentence or two could have been "slipped" in about a few games we might play too. Now I know that's not how kids minds work... or peoples minds in general really. I understood that in order to get her there to even have the opportunity to hear God's word I had to tell her about all the appealing stuff first. It's almost as if I were like, "Hey, listen, we are going to have all sorts of fun, we are going to play games you have never even thought of, and maybe make some cute little bracelets for you to take home, and even feed you...but here's what I forgot to mention, we would also really appreciate it if you stayed for a short little Bible Study at the end too."
I wince at the thought of that being the way things come across.
One thing I know for sure though is if it's up to me iGod will NOT be just another "Short-term outreach project". I have seen it happen far too often, and I have even been apart of it... Church groups will agree on one Saturday with the determination to go out and help "fix" the community. Maybe it is a little harsh to say, but seriously you are not fixing much by going into a child's life for one day. Sure it's nice of you to give them some entertainment or some lovin' for a bit, but how much of that are you taking with you at the end of the day when you just walk out of their lives like so many other people have done before.
I think it is ignorant for any of us to think we have the right to go out in mind-set of "fixing" the people and brokenness of a community. Truth is we are all so broken and in need of fixing. It's not about who has more money, or stuff, or connections. It's not about who has more friends, or better clothes, or a nicer house. It's about our savior, and the compassion and altruism he has for us. It's about us realizing how much potential we really have without also losing a grasp on just how tiny of a little spec we are in the great scheme or things.
Surely I should take off my shoes, or raise up my hands, or fall to my knees... Surely this moment is Holy.
God has been so good to us!
I think of the opportunity I was given on Tuesday to buy 9 bundles of joy their very OWN Bible. (And for most their very FIRST bible too!) I think of the way that we have never once had 9 kids come to iGod on a single day, but I think of what a blessing it was to be forced to wait to hand out Bibles because we had 4 more kids show up than we had Bibles to give! Three of which I had never even seen before!
Now that's a "Problem" worth celebrating!
It blows me away that we have been at Creekwood every Wednesday afternoon since September and still haven't seen or met all the kids who live there. I think of all the kids who just in the last month or two have started coming regularly. Which makes me wonder how many more kids are out there maybe looking on apprehensively from their window each week, still trying to determine if we are just going to be another "short-term outreach project" or not. Still trying to determine if we are going to stick around or not.
I think everyone is still trying to figure us out.
I was just asked yesterday by one of the new girls what exactly we are doing in their neighborhood every week... I was quick to explain to her all the games we play, or the crafts we make, and the snacks we have. But right at the very end of our conversation I slipped in the part about Bible study. Yep, that's right, I "slipped" it in. Now I don't know about you, but if our mission is solely focused around sharing the love of Christ, I don't think having Bible study deserves to just be "Slipped" in at the end. If anything the bulk of my answer to her question should have been about all that takes place to equip them and help them grow in their relationship with the Lord, and then maybe a sentence or two could have been "slipped" in about a few games we might play too. Now I know that's not how kids minds work... or peoples minds in general really. I understood that in order to get her there to even have the opportunity to hear God's word I had to tell her about all the appealing stuff first. It's almost as if I were like, "Hey, listen, we are going to have all sorts of fun, we are going to play games you have never even thought of, and maybe make some cute little bracelets for you to take home, and even feed you...but here's what I forgot to mention, we would also really appreciate it if you stayed for a short little Bible Study at the end too."
I wince at the thought of that being the way things come across.
One thing I know for sure though is if it's up to me iGod will NOT be just another "Short-term outreach project". I have seen it happen far too often, and I have even been apart of it... Church groups will agree on one Saturday with the determination to go out and help "fix" the community. Maybe it is a little harsh to say, but seriously you are not fixing much by going into a child's life for one day. Sure it's nice of you to give them some entertainment or some lovin' for a bit, but how much of that are you taking with you at the end of the day when you just walk out of their lives like so many other people have done before.
I think it is ignorant for any of us to think we have the right to go out in mind-set of "fixing" the people and brokenness of a community. Truth is we are all so broken and in need of fixing. It's not about who has more money, or stuff, or connections. It's not about who has more friends, or better clothes, or a nicer house. It's about our savior, and the compassion and altruism he has for us. It's about us realizing how much potential we really have without also losing a grasp on just how tiny of a little spec we are in the great scheme or things.
Saturday, January 5, 2013
2012 In A Wrap
Here lies the last year of my life documented into one neat and confined space! Those of you who are friends with me on Facebook may have seen me post there but I will say it again here. I believe the last year has been so full of God's blessings and extravagant surprises. Everyday another gift. Beautiful and unexpected. I feel spoiled rotten by the God of the universe, his love just too grand and too perfect for little broken me.
There were SO many memorable times during 2012, here are just a few...
Competed in an exhilarating 5k called Color Me Rad!
Competed in the Goodwill Mud Run 5k.....Twice!
Met the USA National Women Soccer Captain Christie Rampone.
Asked a stranger how we could pray for them and prayed with them!
Went Zip Lining through the North Carolina country side.
Took multiple trips to the lake. My friend Ashley and I pretty much lived there this summer!
Played hours and hours of soccer! Including once at Mid-night!
Went tubing with some amazing people.
Went river tubing in a lightning storm!
Completed a high ropes course.
Invested every Wednesday night with these crazy kids!
Packaged food bags for the less fortunate in Haiti.
Slathered up a trampoline with soap for some slippery summer time fun.
Had a cake fight with this amazing girl.
Got my license and my very own car!
Started a "Backyard Bible Club" at a local Apartment Complex.
Not pictured 2012 Accomplishments/ Activities:
-Went snowboarding in North Carolina.
-Found my Celebrity Look-A-Like
-Learned how to Crochet.
-Memorized the whole Chapter of Romans 8 in the Bible.
-Completed my Freshman year in High School.
-Partied in Walmart at 2:00 AM
-Filled up a WHOLE Journal. To the back of the very last page!
-Sang at an obnoxious level in public.
-Helped throw a surprise party.
-Laid in awe stargazing countless nights.
-Learned I have a condition in my thumbs called brachydactyly.
-Read at least 50 Novels.
-Syran wrapped 2 friends cars.
-Attended a formal dance....Never again!
-Walked to school.
-Danced in the Fountain at Southern Wesleyan University.
-Had some of the most inspiring conversations ever.
-Landed my first paid photography job.
-Witnessed a few of my dear friends get saved and/or baptized.
-Grew in my faith of God's timing.
-Laughed until I cried multiple, multiple times.
-Stood motionless in front of God's creation numerous times. Most often at a sunset.
-Shared my life with some of the most amazing people on the planet.
I can't imagine what the year 2013 will bring!
Peter
Peter is the Rock on which God built his church.
But first, Peter was the worst disciple ever.
I am Peter.
For each time I deny God the glory that is his.
For each time I follow my will instead of listening to his.
For each time I jump ahead without consulting my Lord.
He asks. "Daughter do you truly love me? Then come feed my sheep and follow me" and I am...Or at least I am trying.
I am Peter.
I mess up.
I make mistakes.
I am far from perfect BUT God will use me.
You are Peter.
God already knows that you will make a mess, but his plan for you is great.
So Go.
And feed his Sheep!
But first, Peter was the worst disciple ever.
I am Peter.
For each time I deny God the glory that is his.
For each time I follow my will instead of listening to his.
For each time I jump ahead without consulting my Lord.
He asks. "Daughter do you truly love me? Then come feed my sheep and follow me" and I am...Or at least I am trying.
I am Peter.
I mess up.
I make mistakes.
I am far from perfect BUT God will use me.
You are Peter.
God already knows that you will make a mess, but his plan for you is great.
So Go.
And feed his Sheep!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)